June 01, 2006
Nahuatl is the language of nature...
So says this piece of what George Moneo has so rightly termed "Bovine Excrement". It's worth the 2 minutes out of your life to laugh and shake your head at the self-important idiocy that passes for education around here. Keep in mind that this POS had to get a charter from the county, so somebody actually bought into this.....
Quick! The Smug cloud is descending over Los Angeles! Oh no!
On a related note, Cobb has some interesting thoughts on immigration and the Latino community....
Those crazy Bad Example kids
They've gone and spawned again!
Courtesy of Adopted Blog-Mom Bou, we have a new blog-sis, Mrs. Who of House of Zathras.
And true to the formula that the Bad Example family tree is often more of a stick than a tree, adopted blog-sis VW contributes a new blog sis/niece, her real life sister Tink of Tink's Tribulations.
June 02, 2006
Blowing it away!
Christina finishes up the blog novella with a bang. Literally. And more twists than a pretzel.
If you haven't been keeping up with this project, and you're a fan of thriller/spy/suspense fiction, take a few minutes and read through the whole thing. Each chapter is just 1,000 words, so it takes just a few minutes to get through the whole story. Perfect for a coffee break!
Chapter 1: The Reluctant Assassin
Chapter 2: The Cleaner
Chapter 3: House of Cards
Chapter 4: Beautiful Death
Chapter 5: Deal Killer
The times we live in....
Possible chemical weapons raid by British police
Ricin and Pipe Bombs found in suburban Tennessee home
And then there's this
I love my blog child, but sometimes he just makes me scratch my head.
For what it's worth, Paul, I'd say it's a Phillip's™ Screwdriver.
The Intellectual Left
Emphasis mine. I couldn't just excerpt a few sentences... Now, for that rant: Read More "The Intellectual Left" »"The left, to a man, considers itself to be educated and enlightened. It matters not how little actual schooling a particlular leftist may have had, nor how unintelligent the person might be. They all consider themselves intellectuals of sorts. If they dropped out of college after one semester, they just think of themselves as autodidacts whose genius could not be stimulated by the ossified and bourgeois teaching of the academy....
This conceit, usually wholly undeserved, of practically every leftist in the world is what makes leftism so intoxicating for the intellectually insecure, and what makes leftists so easily led and manipulated. It's an attractive doctrine for those who wish to conceive of themselves as intellectual and brilliant, for it provides an instant short-cut to the equivalent of an MIT education. If you simply believe these things we tell you to believe, you are one of Us, one of the Intellectually Elite, one of the Cultural Vanguard. Just as giving oneself to Christ, and believing in His power, and accepting the need for and gift of His redemption, instantly makes one "saved" and enters one's name in the Book of the Heaven, so too does accepting leftist tropes and core beliefs make one one of the Secular Elect.
Now, the things the left wants you to believe are not easy to believe. It's hard to believe that, for example, taxing work and investment will not reduce work and investment (especially when one simultaneously believes that taxing the use of gasoline or other energy will reduce the use of gasoline or other energy). Nevertheless, while it may be difficult to believe these things, it's certainly easier to simply give in and believe these things than to, say, earn a Ph. D. in literary theory or semiotics or even something stupid like science or engineering.
So, if one wants to conceive of oneself as an intellectual, one can either actually become an intellectual -- which frankly takes a lot of work and reading, much of it terribly boring -- or one can simply believe what Noam Chomsky tells one....
Leftism, and liberalism, and progressivism, and etc-ism. are not merely simple politics for most of these people. Their politics to them are a core part of their identity, and, more importantly, a central support propping up their egos. They are enlightened because they believe these things; someone who does not believe these things, and yet who, superficially at least, appears to be about as smart as they might be, represents a threat to their egos. The foundation upon which a crucial structure of their sense of self-worth is undermined if they discover that there may be people who can pass as normal and intelligent and yet do not believe as they do.
If one is smart, then one believes in progressivism.
If one believes in progressivism, then one is smart.
Those are the two assumptions that prop up their sense of self worth, and they are refuted by examples of smart people who don't believe in progressivism.
And because there is a great deal of personal psychological investment in progressivism, they react intemperately to rejections of it. It's not merely a tax cut that's being debated; it's their very sense of importance that's being attacked. It's not merely gay marriage which is being argued against; it's their value as human beings that is being uncouthly denigrated."
Just to lighten up the mood around here
You Are Bert |
 Extremely serious and a little eccentric, people find you loveable - even if you don't love them! You are usually feeling: Logical - you rarely let your emotions rule you You are famous for: Being smart, a total neat freak, and maybe just a little evil How you life your life: With passion, even if your odd passions (like bottle caps and pigeons) are baffling to others |
June 03, 2006
An Inconvenient Truth
Life's a bitch, War is Hell, and commitments are hard to keep. We all know this, yet so many people believe that if we simply ignore these truths, they might just go away.
As if
Cassandra of Villainous Company also nails it:
It's long, but well worth it. Read the whole thing!"If only we could go back to the good old days, when there was no news coming out of Iraq and we didn't have to confront the horror. When we could tell ourselves, even if it wasn't true, that our hands were clean.
I hope one of these smart people, who are so disturbed over our "failures" in Iraq and Afghanistan can tell me what they propose to do when we pull out? What do they think will happen? Why do they think a small minority of Iraqis are planting bombs and practicing terrorism against their fellow Muslims - innocent civilians - in order to prevent a democratic government from being formed?
The insurgents, too, long for the good old days. And right now, we are the only thing standing between them and their heart's desire. And that's an Inconvenient Truth we all too often forget when the media is parading an endless stream of sensationalized stories about Abu Ghuraib and Haditha before our eyes."
June 04, 2006
Gradumacation!
So yesterday was our school's graduation ceremony. We're a small university, but it's still fun to get dressed up and see all of my colleagues in their academic regalia, too.
The color and style of the robe, hood, and cap denote the wearer's academic degree, field of study, and alma mater, so in a full faculty group, you get a pretty wide variety, although most are some variation of black robe, mortarboard cap, and royal blue or green velvet on the hood.
Mine aren't!
Oh, and for those of you that asked...
Here's what the haircut did.
From this:
To this:
More than 12 inches off. I donated it.
June 05, 2006
We're back!
Did you miss us? MuNuvia was the target of at least 3 different DDOS attacks this weekend, but Pixy seems to have everything under control again for the moment, so we return you to your regularly scheduled programming, already in progress...
Yummy Yum!
You Are a Chocolate Chip Cookie |
 You're friendly and easy to get to know. This makes you very popular - without even trying! |
h/t oatmeal raisin Marie
You can't win for losing...
The recent increase in Atlantic hurricane activity may be tied, not to global warming, but to the ENVIRONMENTAL CLEANUP we've been working so diligently on over the last few decades.
"Cleaner air and more Atlantic hurricanes may come as a pair, according to a new study comparing rising global sea surface temperatures with sun-blocking pollution particles.Take that Enviro-Nazis. You're actually making things worse!It turns out that the recent decline of small manmade pollution particles called aerosols in the North Atlantic might be allowing hurricane activity to catch up with the effects of global warming there, reported climate researchers Michael Mann and Kerry Emanuel in a new study in the journal Eos."
One Down!
Thanks to Captain Rod Brind'amour, Carolina takes Game 1, 5-4 with 31 seconds left in regulation.
Stupidest Cheater EVER
As many of you know, my sweet husband is a high school teacher. He is currently teaching 4 classes of Earth Science to 9-12 graders at his school.
One of his grading policies is that students MAY turn in late work for partial credit before the end of the quarter, and he is more than happy to give any student a progress report showing their score on each assignment and including a list of what is missing at any time.
Recently, one student, hereafter known as Ms. I (for Idiot) was told of several assignments she was missing, and she assured my husband that they had been turned in, and she would bring the graded assignments in this week as proof that he had somehow not recorded them.
So today she turns in 7 or 8 assignments, all with the same interesting characteristic. The top right corner of each assignment was torn off. As you may recall from your own school days or from your kids' homework, that's usually the place where you write your name, date, and class number. Except for one, and on that one the name written in the name blank is scratched out and her name is written below.
Her name was written wherever she could fit it in.
Also, each assignment is in a different pen/pencil, although all of the places where she has written her name are in the SAME black pen. However, more interestingly, each assignment was in a DIFFERENT HANDWRITING.
I really don't know how she expected to get away with it. I mean HONESTLY. Idiot.
June 06, 2006
Not Just Omen Day
June 6, 2006 is also the 62nd anniversary of the invasion of Normandy, D-Day.
Yesterday was also the 2nd anniversary of the death of one of my heroes, President Ronald Reagan.
So it only seems fitting to quote him on this occasion. From the President's speech on the 40th anniversary of the Normandy invasion:
We in America have learned bitter lessons from two world wars. It is better to be here ready to protect the peace, than to take blind shelter across the sea, rushing to respond only after freedom is lost. We've learned that isolationism never was and never will be an acceptable response to tyrannical governments with an expansionist intent. But we try always to be prepared for peace, prepared to deter aggression, prepared to negotiate the reduction of arms, and yes, prepared to reach out again in the spirit of reconciliation. In truth, there is no reconciliation we would welcome more than a reconciliation with the Soviet Union, so, together, we can lessen the risks of war, now and forever.Twenty-two years ago, and an entire world away. But the sentiment still holds true. We do not desire war, but we will use it to keep the despots of the world in check and bring liberty to their people.It's fitting to remember here the great losses also suffered by the Russian people during World War II. Twenty million perished, a terrible price that testifies to all the world the necessity of ending war. I tell you from my heart that we in the United States do not want war. We want to wipe from the face of the earth the terrible weapons that man now has in his hands. And I tell you, we are ready to seize that beachhead. We look for some sign from the Soviet Union that they are willing to move forward, that they share our desire and love for peace, and that they will give up the ways of conquest. There must be a changing there that will allow us to turn our hope into action.
We will pray forever that someday that changing will come. But for now, particularly today, it is good and fitting to renew our commitment to each other, to our freedom, and to the alliance that protects it.
Feisty Again!
The lovely Christina has been one of the biggest casualties of the DDoS attack on MuNuvia. Her blog is still down, but being the resourceful gal that she is, she's opened up shop in her old digs and has resumed her former Feisty-ness. If you've been looking for her, she'll be there until further notice.
Being a Parent means being an adult, mm'kay?
I'm not a parent, but I don't think that means I've given up the right to complain about how other people's kids behave in public.
After all, I was a kid once, and certain things were expected of me. I needed to be quiet, not silent, mind you, but quiet. I was required to keep my food on the table, refrain from spilling if at all possible, and I had to say "Please" and "Thank You" to the wait staff. Even to the person behind the counter at McDonald's
So it irks the holy crap out of me when people these days refuse to discipline their children for acting out in a restaurant.
It's pretty simple:
--If you can't trust your young child to behave acceptably in public, don't take them out. Even a normally well-behaved child who is tired.
--If your child gets loud, take them out. The waitstaff will be more than happy to watch your belongings while you're outside if you have to leave the table altogether for a few minutes. There's a big difference between a 30 second outburst and a 10 minute screaming jag.
--Make sure your kids know what is expected of them and be willing to give them consequences. I knew I sure as hell was gonna sit in the car if I acted out.
--Manners start at home. Use your everyday dining experience to teach "please" and "thank you" and how to use utensils properly.
In this op-ed piece in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution, mother of 2 Wendy Heath takes the manager of a "family" restaurant to task for asking them to leave after her 2 year old pitched a fit.
The response has been huge. And nearly all of it siding with the manager. This prompted another column in the AJ-C, defending Ms. Heath's outrage. Read the column, and the responses to it.
Some people will just never understand.
h/t McGehee
It's Beastly!
The date being 6/6/6, which is of course the "biblical number of the Beast", The Pirate brings you some lesser known numbers relating to "The Beast"... well, you'll see.
Drink warning for some of them....
Update to Miss Idiot (below)
3 days detention and a bunch of zeros.
Her excuse? "There was too much stuff to do and not that much time to do it in."
Well, yeah, if you don't do it when it's due and then wait until right before the end of the school year....
At least she was embarassed and apologized.
The Curse of the Doxies
Or why bathing the dogs is more trouble than it's worth. 4 little dogs (one blind) vs one woman and a bottle of wine....
Complete with funny illustrations!
June 07, 2006
A great way to ruin a laptop....
Claws + Screen = OUCH
But the kitty seems to be enjoying himself!
h/t Dean
Two Down, Two to Go!
Hurricanes shut out Edmonton 5-0
Game 3 is Saturday, 8pm EDT on NBC in the US, CBC in Canada.
Let's go Canes!
Potential good news....BREAKING
According to ABC news, who is the ONLY one on the story right now....
Zarqawi is TOAST.
Special Report interrupted Nightline, not even on the web page yet
Update: Acc. to Technorati, I am indeed the first to report this. I even beat Kos by 10 minutes! Holy Crap!
June 08, 2006
Confirmed
The Pig F*cker is in fact actually dead. You heard it here first.
Now that the MSM is on the story full-blast, here are some of the more interesting articles:
FoxNews: Terminated
CNN: Hunted Down
BBC: Iraq Allies Hail Zarqawi Killing
Aljazeera: Al-Zarqawi Killed in Airstrike
June 09, 2006
Happy Birthday!
Exgaucho Ben celebrates his SECOND 30th birthday :)
What are you waiting for? Head over there, quick!
Who are these Cotillion Gals, anyway?
For this week's Cotillion, some of your favorite conservative ladies will tell you a little about themselves:
1. What time did you get up this morning? 8:30 AM
2. Diamonds or pearls? Both, dahlink. Diamond ring and bracelet, pearl necklace and earrings
3. What was the last film you saw at the movie house? The Chronicles of Narnia
4. What is your favorite TV show?
Currently on? House, Ever? The Pretender
5. What did you have for breakfast? Nothing yet. Probably will have some cold pizza, though.
6. What is your middle name? Bitch
7. What is your favorite cuisine? Armenian
8. What foods do you dislike? Brussel Sprouts, Olives, Canned Tuna, Sweet Pickles, Anchovies
9. What kind of car do you drive? a Ford Escape
10. Favorite Sandwich? Monte Cristo, no powdered sugar
11. What characteristic do you despise? Arrogance
12. Favorite item of clothing? My jeans!
13. If you could go anywhere in the world for a holiday where would you go? New Zealand
14. What color is your bathroom? White and blue, with Winnie the Pooh accents
15. Favorite brand of clothing? Any brand that fits.
16. Where would you like to retire? California's Central Coast
17. Favorite time of the day? Evening
18. What was your most memorable birthday? My 17th. My friends threw me a surprise party.
19. Where were you born? Fresno, CA
20. Favorite sport to watch? Hockey and Football
21. What are you wearing right now? Jammies
22. What star sign are you? Scorpio
23. What fabric detergent do you use? Tide with Bleach
24. Pepsi or Coke? Dr. Pepper
25. Are you a morning person or a night owl? NIGHT OWL. What is this morning of which you speak?
26. What is your shoe size? 9.5 wide
27. Do you have any pets? The Princess
28. Any new exciting news you\'d like to share with your readers? I have a cold.
29. What did you want to be when you were little? a Radiologist.
30. What are you meant to be doing today? Working. I took a sick day.
For more about me, see my Eleventy-One things about me page here.
Makes you wonder if they read their own blog
The ABC News' blog The Blotter has a very interesting piece on the man who turned in Zarqawi... And they're getting slammed by the readers for it. 280 comments and counting.
This is EXACTLY why your ratings are going down, you opportunistic slugs.
h/t LGF
June 10, 2006
Did they or didn't they?
Much buzz in the b'sphere over whether or not Zarqawi may have been "assaulted" by US troops when they recovered his still-smoking, almost-dead carcass.
To paraphrase Bob Uecker's classic line from Major League, "Who gives a sh*t? [he]'s gone."
June 12, 2006
In honor of Alberto...
... and the first hurricane warning of the season:
An oldie but a goodie, the Piper-Kitty Scale
That's longer than a bad TV show....
According to news reports, Zarqawi lived 52 minutes after the bombing.
So I'm wondering, what were the commercials like? And what took him so long to croak?
But, I was listening to him this morning!
Big Ben Roethlisberger, Super Bowl winning QB with the Pittsburgh Steelers (and 24 year old hot head) was in a serious motorcycle crash this morning.
Dumbass was not wearing a helmet, which is LEGAL in Pennsylvania.
Late reports say he has serious head injuries, including a concussion, facial lacerations, missing teeth and a broken nose, cheek, and jaw. He may also have knee injuries. Kellen Winslow, Jr. Jr., anyone?
Evidently he flew over the handlebars of his fancy little crotch-rocket into the front of an oncoming Chrysler New Yorker.
The accident happened not long after Roethlisberger gave an interview to Tony Bruno and Mark Willard on their syndicated sports talk show, which I was listening to this morning. It was kind of a shock to hear the same voice who joked with Ben at 6am announce his accident 2 hours later.
We could use a cat like that here, too
After the recent rash of local bear-in-swimming-pool stories, I bet some people would be happy to have Jack the Tabby around:
A black bear got more than it bargained for after straying into a family garden in the US state of New Jersey.Go get 'em kitty cat!The unwelcome intruder was forced up a tree - twice - by the family pet, a tabby cat called Jack.
The terrified bear was only able to make its escape when owner Donna Dickey called the hissing cat into the house.
June 13, 2006
Damn Good Day!
I woke up to hear that dookie Golden Boy and probably 1st-round NBA pick JJ Redick was busted for DWI (that's driving while impaired for all you non- Tar Heels) at 1am last night. Evidently Mr. Smartypants thought he could make an illegal U-turn to avoid a DUI checkpoint. Yeah, nothing like calling attention to yourself, right, Star-Boy?
Then, I got to work, checked the news and heard that President Ballsy Bush made a surprise trip to Baghdad, where he visited briefly with troops in the Green Zone and met with the new Iraqi cabinet.
Also, we're having a potluck for lunch and I have a long meeting that gets me out of sitting in my office. Yay!
Everything you ever wanted to know, but were afraid to ask...
About the ladies of the Cotillion!
Check out 30 things about each of these brilliant ladies, as compiled by Cassandra
I'm dreaming of a white Fitzmas.....
A holiday that will never be...
Suck it, conspiracy moonbats, Rove didn't break the law, and hence WILL NOT BE CHARGED in the CIA leak case.
Why on earth would the President want to bury good news about Rove under his trip to Baghdad?
The day just keeps getting better.
Now hear this!
Most of you probably have seen this story about the ring tone that supposedly only teens can hear.
It's an ultra-high frequency tone, around 17-18 kHz, and most adults lose the ability to distinguish such tones as we age and the hair cells in our inner ears are damaged, either from getting older, or excess exposure to loud noises, including music. Teens, however, should be able to hear it just fine...
As can most dogs and cats....
Anyway, Steve-O has the link here. Turn up the volume and click the player. I can hear it just fine, thanks, as annoying as it is.
Trust me, any of the little f*ckers show up in my class with that, I will own their cell phone for the rest of the day.
Spin it!
Two headlines, same story:
1) "Bush May Meet Vow To Halve The Deficit Three Years Early" --Investors Business Daily
2) "Bush Deficit Reduction Plan Falls Off-Schedule." -- Guess who (acc. to Insty, but I can't find the headline anywhere on their site anymore)
June 14, 2006
Update to yesterday
Yesterday actually ended up pretty good. I got some business taken care of, I had a good meeting with my boss, traffic was decent, and I got new seat covers for my car.
Any of you with leather seats (not by my choice, this was the car they had on the lot with the other features I wanted) will understand that summer + leather seats = ouch. The old sheepskin seat cover had seen better days, so we went to Target last night and replaced it. Yay!
Then my hubby took me out to dinner :) What a nice guy.
Tonight, Tonight
The Hurricanes could win it all tonight, and drink from Lord Stanley's cup!
At home. In the best arena in the NHL, in front of the best fans in the league.
Ok, I'm a little biased, but the truth of the matter is that every game night, 18,000 southerners fill an arena built on what used to be a cow pasture in the middle of nowhere to watch hockey. On ice. A sport that would otherwise be anathema to them.
Let's go 'Canes!
Happy Birthday!
To the coolest dude I know:
The one who taught me to swing a hammer, drive, hit a baseball, barbecue, properly prune a rosebush, mow the lawn, diagnose a troublesome noise in the car, always use Yellow Power Bait, and vote Republican.
And also the one who taught me to be considerate of others, gracious in accepting gifts, respectful of my elders, to love my God and my country, see the best in other people, love my family and friends fiercely, and always do my best.
Not to mention to have fun, be careful and ALWAYS hold on tight.
Happy Birthday, Dad!
June 15, 2006
Weird
So yesterday was a BP day for me. As in HIGH BP.
-- Talking about this bullsh*t
--F*cking Dodger game next Friday is sold out in 2 days
--F*cking Hurricanes lose in OT
--Goddamn pissy bastard at Wal-Mart trying to tell me that the garden center is closed 45 seconds after the storewide announcement: "The Garden Center will be closing in 5 minutes."(presumably at 9pm) THEN he shows me his watch and says, "See?? It's 9:01". My response: "That's not my problem. Get the person who makes the PA announcements to set her clock forward". His manager told him to ring me up and the 3 ladies behind me who also wanted to leave from the garden center. His response? "But I never got my break". Whiny asshole.
--I had this dream last night where something happened, and DH knew what it was, but I was prevented from seeing it by him (not a bad thing, though), and no one would tell me what was going on. I kept asking, and no one would answer me. The last thing I remember is punching Ben in the face repeatedly for smirking, talking to other people, and not answering me. I also remember considering jumping up on the coffee table and firing a gun into the ceiling to get people's attention. Then I woke up with fists clenched and really pissed off. Ask my DH. He thought I was gonna punch him.
Moral of the story? Don't F*ck with Wendy Testaburger.
Experience Bij!*
Way too many links to Klingon Language Sites from Harvey.
* Bij is the Klingon word for pain
I'd Rather Not
Seems Old Dan has finally gotten the boot at CBS....
CBS executives have decided there is no future role at the network for Dan Rather, making it certain that the man who sat in the anchor chair for 24 years will depart by this fall.h/t OTB
Some people may think it's really because they didn't believe him.....
Why God never received a PhD:
1. He had only one major publication.
2. It was in Hebrew.
3. It had no references.
4. It wasn't published in a refereed journal.
5. Some even doubt he wrote it by himself.
6. It may be true that he created the world, but what has he done since then?
7. His cooperative efforts have been quite limited.
8. The scientific community has had a hard time replicating his results.
9. He never applied to the ethics board for permission to use human subjects.
10. When one experiment went awry he tried to cover it by drowning his subjects.
11. When subjects didn't behave as predicted, he deleted them from the sample.
12. He rarely came to class, just told students to read the book.
13. Some say he had his son teach the class.
14. He expelled his first two students for learning.
15. Although there were only 10 requirements, most of his students failed his tests.
16. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.
17. No record of working well with colleagues.
h/t Lisa
June 16, 2006
Pretty Much, Yeah.
Your Bumper Sticker Should Be |
 I do whatever my Rice Krispies tell me to! |
h/t alien-prone Jen
June 19, 2006
Cluck off, Chickie!
Last week, the Dixie Chicks ruffled a few feathers when singer Natalie Maines dismissed her ENTIRE fan base, saying,
"I'd rather have a smaller following of really cool people who get it, who will grow with us as we grow and are fans for life, than people that have us in their five-disc changer with Reba McEntire and Toby Keith," she told Time. "We don't want those kinds of fans. They limit what you can do."This week, she's back, and served up her other foot for another tasty meal:
"The entire country may disagree with me, but I don't understand the necessity for patriotism," Maines resumes, through gritted teeth. "Why do you have to be a patriot? About what? This land is our land? Why? You can like where you live and like your life, but as for loving the whole country… I don't see why people care about patriotism."--emphasis mine, ed.No wonder the Clucks are having a hard time selling out arenas in places like Memphis, Indianapolis, and Fresno. Yeah, their album debuted at #1, but anyone in the biz will tell you that album sales mean nothing to the artist. They make all of their money touring. Cancelling concerts is bad news on the pocketbook. Especially the new Louis Vuitton ones, right, Natalie?
All the snark aside, I'd like to remind Ms. Maines and her colleagues that the SINGLE, ONLY, UNIQUE, UNITARY, etc. reason that she has this soapbox, that she's made all the money in her bank account, that she can fly to France or the UK whenever she wants and spout off about this country is that she is a CITIZEN OF THE US.
Don't love your country, Natalie, it's ok. Really, The rest of us could give a shit. But don't tell us we're stupid for caring. Don't tell us that you like your life and then spit in the face of those people who have died or sacrificed much so that you can live the way you do.
Why should people care about patriotism, Natalie? Well, because patriotism created this country, it sacrificed to preserve out way of life, and continues to do so over and over again every day. Patriotism is why you can stand on your soapbox and denounce the President. Patriotism is why you speak English, not German or Japanese. Patriotism provides you with the security to go about your business and raise your children as you see fit.
The truth is, see, that in the long run, it is the patriot whose contributions will matter. The small effort of each individual to preserve and prolong the grand experiment in democracy started more than 200 years ago by another group of patriots whose motives were questioned by ignorant fools like you. Your contributions, your songs, your rabble rousing, your chicken feet tatoos; they'll all be gone with the proverbial wind. But this country, and the patriots who protect her, will still be here.
What was the most popular song/singer of 1776? You don't know? Well, in 2206 I can assure you the same answer will be spoken in response to "Who were the Dixie Chicks?"
Irony of the day
Lifted wholesale from Insty:
AL GORE WON'T ENDORSE JOE LIEBERMAN. Comment: "I guess Lieberman would have been good enough to run the government if something bad happened to Gore. But he's not obviously the best qualified to be the junior senator from Connecticut, even though he had the same job when Gore tapped him in 2000."Wow. Either being POTUS has lower requirements than I thought, or Algore has just reinvented the internet... Who needs Algore anyway? I love Joe, and I'd vote for him in a heartbeat!
June 20, 2006
Storm Warning
There's nothing else to say, except this:
Justin Williams (left) and Eric Staal know the Stanley Cup is theirs after Williams scored into an empty net to give Carolina a 3-1 lead. (AP Photo/Ann Heisenfelt)
"It's just surreal," said Rod Brind'Amour, the Hurricanes' 35-year-old captain, after winning his first Stanley Cup in his 16th NHL season. (Jim McIsaac/Getty Images)
June 21, 2006
This is pretty accurate....
| You Are 56% Lady |
 |
June 22, 2006
Gnarly!
Not only do these guys sound pretty good, they have a cool name and awesome taste in costumery:
You know, when I was a kid, I always thought Darth Vader would be black under the mask....
h/t Dean
Good Advice!
Clearly this last is the most important!Fifteen Ways To Avoid A Good Southern Ass Whuppin -
(Issued by the Southern Tourism Bureau to ALL visiting Northerners And Northeastern Urbanites)
1) Don’t order filet mignon or pasta primavera at Waffle House. It’s just a diner. They serve breakfast 24 hours a day. Let them cook something they know. If you confuse them, they’ll kick your ass.
2) Don’t laugh at our Southern names (Merlene, Bodie, Ovine, Luther Ray, Tammy Lynn, Darla Beth, Laura Jo Inez, Billy Joe, Sissy, Clovis, Perky, Becky Sue, etc.). Or we will just HAVE to kick your ass.
3) Don’t order a bottle of pop or a can of soda down here. Down here it’s called Coke. Nobody gives a flying damn whether it’s Pepsi, RC, Dr. Pepper, 7-Up or whatever- it’s still a Coke. Accept it. Doing otherwise can lead to an ass kicking.
4) We know our heritage. Most of us are more literate than you (e.g.,Welty, Williams, Faulkner). We are also better educated and generally a lot nicer. Don’t refer to us as a bunch of hillbillies, or we’ll kick your ass.
5) We have plenty of business sense (e.g., Fred Smith of Fed Ex, Turner Broadcasting, MCI WorldCom, MTV, Netscape). Naturally, we do, sometimes, have small lapses in judgment (e.g., Carter, Edwards, Duke, Barnes, Clinton). We don’t care if you think we are dumb. We are not dumb enough to let someone move to our state in order to run for the Senate. If someone tried to do that, we would kick their ass.
6) Don’t laugh at our Civil War monuments. If Lee had listened to Longstreet and flanked Meade at Gettysburg instead of sending Pickett up the middle, you’d be paying taxes to Richmond instead of Washington. If you visit Stone Mountain and complain about the carving, we’ll kick your ass.
7) We are fully aware of how high the humidity is, so shut the hell up. Just spend your money and get the hell out of here, or we’ll kick your ass.
8) Don’t order wheat toast at Cracker Barrel. Everyone will instantly know that you’re a Yankee. Eat your biscuits like God intended - with gravy. And don’t EVER put sugar on your grits, or we’ll kick your ass.
9) Don’t fake a Southern accent. This will incite a riot, and you will get your ass kicked.
10) Don’t talk about how much better things are at home because we know better. Many of us have visited Northern shitholes like Detroit, Chicago , and DC, and we have the scars to prove it. If you don’t like it here, Delta is ready when you are. Move your ass on home before it gets kicked.
11) Yes, we know how to speak proper English. We talk this way because we don’t want to sound like you. We don’t care if you don’t understand what we are saying. All other Southerners understand what we are saying, and that’s all that matters. Now, go away and leave us alone, or we’ll kick your ass.
12) Don’t complain that the South is dirty and polluted. None of OUR lakes or rivers have caught fire recently. If you whine about OUR scenic beauty, we’ll kick your ass all the way back to Boston Harbor.
13) Don’t ridicule our Southern manners. We say sir and ma’am. We hold doors open for others. We offer our seats to old folks because such things are expected of civilized people. Behave yourselves around our sweet little gray-haired grandmothers or they’ll kick some manners into your ass just like they did ours.
14) So you think we’re quaint or losers because most of us live in the countryside? That’s because we have enough sense to not live in filthy, smelly, crime-infested cesspools like New York or Baltimore. Make fun of our fresh air, and we’ll kick your ass.
15) Last, but not least, DO NOT DARE to come down here and tell us how to cook barbecue. This will get your ass shot (right after it is kicked). You’re lucky we let you come down here at all. Criticize our barbecue, and you will go home in a pine box.. . . Minus your ass.
h/t Gay Patriot Bruce
June 23, 2006
Skool's out for summer....
Taking today off to help hubby clean out his classroom. He has to be done by 12:30 or so. And then he gets something like 4 weeks off before he starts a summer workshop. At least he's getting paid for it!
Behind the times as usual...
You Belong in 1959 |
If you scored... 1950 - 1959: You're fun loving, romantic, and more than a little innocent. See you at the drive in! 1960 - 1969: You are a free spirit with a huge heart. Love, peace, and happiness rule - oh, and drugs too. 1970 - 1979: Bold and brash, you take life by the horns. Whether you're partying or protesting, you give it your all! 1980 - 1989: Wild, over the top, and just a little bit cheesy. You're colorful at night - and successful during the day. 1990 - 1999: With you anything goes! You're grunge one day, ghetto fabulous the next. It's all good! |
h/t 1970's Beth
Mwahahahahahaha
That's hockey for ya':
I love it when The Onion gets the accessory facts more correct than the REAL local paper.....RALEIGH, NC-- Only hours after the Carolina Hurricanes won the NHL Championship Monday night in a hard-fought Game 7 against the Edmonton Oilers, North Carolina Gov. Michael Easley mobilized the National Guard to contain over two dozen members of what he described as "some sort of depraved, violent, heretofore unheard-of gang calling themselves the Hurricanes."
"These strange men came out of nowhere with absolutely no warning," Easley said of the Stanley Cup-winning Hurricanes, who emptied garbage cans, overturned vehicles and set them aflame, looted local businesses, and frightened hundreds of citizens out of their sleep. "Nobody had ever heard of them before. No one knows what they want. And nobody knows why they were acting so crazy."
Police chief Jane Perlov is reporting that the NHL club, which was known as the Hartford Whalers until moving to North Carolina in 1997 and has struggled to attract much local attention, "somehow gained access to Raleigh's RBC Center earlier Monday, engaged in some sort of ritualistic violence involving sticks and nets, and then proceeded to drink heavily before heading to their cars."
June 24, 2006
They grow up so fast!
My darling blog-child celebrates (real life) birthday number 50 today!
Happy Birthday, Paul, and many many more!
Drop by and leave him a note, would you?
June 26, 2006
Babies and more babies...
Since she announced it, I can post it, I guess.
Jen (and Beau) are pregnant! YAY! Due date some time near Valentine's Day.
Congratulations are also in order for Brandon of Brandon's Puppy. His mom Amanda is going to give him a baby brother or sister sometime towards the end of February!
What is this with bloggers and winter babies? Drake, Babylove, and Valerie are all snowflake babies. Huh. In fact, the boys even have the same birthday, just a year apart.
Sad News
My evil Fairy blogfather, Rob Smith, also known as Acidman of Gut Rumbles, passed away this morning.
Not many details are available.
My thoughts and prayers are with his daughter Sam and son Quinton, who I know will miss him very much.
I'll miss you, you lousy cracker son-of-a-bitch. And I regret that I never was able to meet you and buy you a drink (back in the day when you actually partook).
If Rob was a part of your life, let Sam know, and leave her a comment here.
June 27, 2006
The perfect sendoff
Thanks, Chris. He would have been so pleased. Of course, he would have made fun of it the whole time.
It's amazing how someone you've never met can mean so much to your life. Especially someone as f'ed up as Rob. But he made me laugh everyday, he sent biting little emails designed to knock me out of my happy place, and he MEANT it when he called me darlin'.
One of the finest compliments I've received in blogging was being asked to cover for him while he was in Willingway, and so many of the blogfriends I've made, I've made through Rob. He touched a lot of people.
Sam and Quinton, your daddy was a lot of things, many of them not great, but he was a gifted writer and musician, and his unique perspective meant a lot to a lot of people. I hope that in time you'll be blessed by this and you'll come to value the gift that he leaves behind in his archives. Most kids don't get to look into their parent's thoughts, but you have a treasure trove of pieces of your Dad's life. I hope that his writings show you how much he loved you and your uncle and your grandmother and great-grandmother, because family was clearly the best thing in his life.
I will miss him more than I should, I think, and when next I lift a glass, it will be in his memory. Godspeed, Aciddude.
And Rob would have loved this, too.
One more for Rob
Rob's memorial will be Thursday afternoon in Savannah. More details can be found here.
If you'd like to leave the family a note of condolence, there's an obituary here, with links to a guestbook where you can leave the family a message.
Update: Rob's Obit from the Savannah Morning News is here.
June 29, 2006
Welcome Back!
After an extensive amount of down time, beefing up their security after the great MuNu DDOS in June, the JAWAS have returned!
Gut Rumbles
Maybe this is TMI, but the King of Crap Blogging is laughing his ass off somewhere. You see, I missed his online memorial because I was stuck to a toilet. Yeah, we have wireless internet, but at the time, I was a little too screwed up to care....
Anyway, here's my contribution, late as it is.
I will never forget Rob's shifty cracker sense of humor, his delight in all things foul, his hatred of cats, and the pathological fear of snakes that we both shared. I never had a chance to tell him how much in awe I was of his being able to actually kill the damn things, where I would have run screaming for 911.
I will remember how he called me his "favorite rocket scientist" and coopted me into his red-toenail brigade.
But most of all I will never forget two things about Rob: His honesty and his abiding love for his family. Yeah, he saw things from his own, sometimes twisted, point of view, but he wouldn't bullshit you about something important. And, for all of his BS, the love he had for his family was never in doubt.
The world is a lot poorer without him. I hope God appreciates the company.
Last One for Rob
My favorite of today's tributes to Acidman. Mostly because of their honesty. Rob would have enjoyed them.
Kelley
Jim
Juliette
June 30, 2006
We're off to see the wizard
Out and about over the long holiday weekend, so if you're bored with the lack of interesting posts, check out the blogrolls!
Or better yet, go wish the Feisty One a Happy Birthday!
