June 06, 2005

I think they're on to something

Junebugg, Pammy, and Deb are on to something.

It's not what's on the outside that makes a woman sexy. It's what's on the inside.

I'm no model. Hell, I could probably be two of them given the current size for models, but that doesn't mean I can't look and feel sexy.

My husband seems to agree.

So why do we do this to ourselves? Current research suggests that thin isn't all it's cracked up to be, and that what we call "moderately overweight" is more healthy. Doesn't that mean we should rethink what we call fat? Until the advent of TV our idea of "fat" was radically different than it is today....

What do you think?

Posted by caltechgirl at June 6, 2005 10:48 PM

I'm with you there :) As long as we can agree on no thin bashing. I can't help it that I'm thin, but my father's sisters sure made my life hell for being so. We had to live with them and my grandmother when I was in my late teens and they hated my mum, and they despised me, and they made sure I knew it. That's the short, non-TMI version :) I rarely talk about it because it still can make me all queasy inside.

Posted by: Ith at June 7, 2005 01:02 AM

Definitely no thin bashing. My mom has always been skinny as a rail. On the otherhand... I'm what most people would consider 'pleasantly plump'. I like it. I'm comfortable with it. I have never been nor will ever be a model. Then again, I do think you can be too overweight. Particularly as you get older.

Posted by: vw bug at June 7, 2005 07:44 AM

I agree. There's a difference between healthy and unhealthy, and frankly, that's different for every person. My body is healthy at a weight that would be associated with heart disease and limited mobility for a lot of people, but before my RA, I played sports and hiked.

Posted by: caltechgirl at June 7, 2005 08:52 AM

Honey, you know what I say... As long as the Dr. says that you are ok, and that YOU feel ok, I love you all the same. I love you very much, that is all I have to say.

Posted by: Grand Mott Trojan at June 7, 2005 09:48 AM

I'd say it shows the level of one's thinking, deep vs. shallow. The more you spend time considering what are the best attributes in a mate (I, being male) it becomes more and more clear that physical attraction, while necessary, ranks far below all the character attributes.

(Geez, after reading that it sounds so clinical. Do I always sound like that? Argh.)

Posted by: Paladin at June 7, 2005 10:00 AM

A lot of my struggle is loving myself even though I have a medical problem that everyone assumes is caused by my weight (I'm not so certain that it is). So I go straight up a wall when I get "it's ok to be fat if you're healthy." :-( Overly touchy, I know, but hey, that's me this morning.

Ith, never thin bashing. Never.

Paladin, my husband *is* physically attracted to me, it's not something he compromised on because he likes my personality, though being attracted to a whole person and not just a physical attribute or two is no doubt part of it.

Good Lord, I sound cranky today. Yikes. Sorry about that.

Posted by: Deb at June 7, 2005 10:51 AM

And there's a difference between overweight and morbidly obese. People who can't even really walk because they weigh so much and they have to use a scooter. And when you have a dear friend nearing that point, a friend you want to be around when you're little old ladies together, it puts weight into a great deal of perspective.

Posted by: Ith at June 7, 2005 11:34 AM

A slippery slope no doubt. It seems to me though that given the state of obesity in America, the last thing we need to is give Americans a reason to be "moderately overweight".

Posted by: ap at June 7, 2005 01:47 PM

Well, that's why any generic metric of weight=health is going to go wrong. Better measures are pulse, BP, cholestrol, blood sugar, etc. which actually measure whether someone has healthy heart, lungs, liver, kidneys, pancreas, etc.

If we reset the metric to what it was 40 or 50 years ago, far fewer people would be considered obese.

Posted by: caltechgirl at June 7, 2005 02:28 PM

My mother has always been one of those types of women who couldn't gain an ounce of weight no matter what she ate.

I, on the other hand, can LOOK at a Twinkie™ and I may as well have rubbed it on my hips.

Not really. . .I was always relatively thin -- until I hit 35-40. Now, I have what I prefer to refer to as a "Rubenesque" figure.

When I was depressed and miserable -- I was thin. (Depression for me = no eating.) When I'm happy, I don't miss too many meals.

And I'm ecstatically happy with my life, my darling husband, and my boys.

Hence, I have probably about 20-30 too many pounds on my frame.

My husband doesn't seem to be turned off by it (thank GAWD) so. . .I will exercise it off or I won't. I talk a lot about feeling uncomfortable at how I look but the truth is: I've NEVER liked how I look. It's just recently that I've ceased to give a shit about what other people think about me. If those that are near and dear to me think I'm okay -- then I'm okay.


Posted by: Margi at June 7, 2005 03:26 PM

Right. These things don't necessarily correspond with weight, nor are they necessarily caused by weight even if they exist in an overweight person. Sometimes losing weight can help. Sometimes it doesn't. *shrug*

Posted by: Deb at June 7, 2005 03:28 PM

Margi, I also don't eat when I'm depressed or stressed. Everyone thinks I'm odd. Well, yeah, but you know what I mean!

Posted by: Ith at June 7, 2005 03:43 PM

Ith, if that makes me odd, then I say I'm in good company, eh? ;o)

Posted by: Margi at June 7, 2005 07:24 PM

Ever since I saw the photo of the "Cosmo" cover girl from the back during a photo shoot, with a cheap piece of cardboard, cut all crooked with scotch tape on some of the edges, stuck into her poofy over-styled hair, holding the hair WAY out to the sides so it looked all full and lush and thick FROM THE FRONT ANGLE where the photo was being taken from, I've disabused myself of the notion that anything the media serves me about how women out there look is "real." Instead, I now believe what I see at the mall: and I just see regular sort of women there. Some a little chunky or plumpish, some kinda skinny, some obese, and everything in between. Nobody, and I mean nobody, has friggin' cardboard taped to their hair.

Posted by: dogette at June 7, 2005 09:03 PM

no kiddin'

Posted by: caltechgirl at June 7, 2005 10:29 PM