Ok, I'm it

Rosemary tagged me with Ogre's If I could be... meme the other day, so here goes (while the scope runs...):

If I could be a scientist (with unlimited grant $$)... I'd set up a state of the art research facility in a little beach town and study how the human brain develops and take lots of breaks to walk in the sand...

If I could be a farmer... I'd raise all kinds of animals and have acres and acres of grapevines....

If I could be a musician... I'd be rich, dammit. RICH! And I would have the coolest tours, with special effects and bubbles and toys for the audience...

If I could be a doctor... I'd cure neurological disease

If I could be a painter... I'd fill my house with murals of things and people I love

If I could be a gardener... I'd have the perfect Southern garden: Wisteria, honeysuckle, roses, jasmine, dogwood, and azaleas, and it would be beautiful with minimal input from me..... Damn I'm going to miss the flowers....

If I could be a missionary... (OK, Rose and Bou both made the joke first, so I won't) I'd spread the Gospel of Dean Smith to the unwashed masses of dookie...

If I could be a chef... I'd be a pastry chef and open a bakery with my friend

If I could be an architect... I'd build my parents their dream house

If I could be a linguist... (again, the joke has already been made) I'd speak French, Armenian, Spanish, English and Polish fluently (I already know how to swear in all of those languages)

If I could be a psychologist... I'd tell people to grow up and quit whining.

If I could be a librarian... I'd be second in command to my mom, the greatest librarian I know :)

If I could be an athlete... I'd play Baseball in the summer and Hockey in the winter

If I could be a lawyer... I'd sue for the practice of common sense

If I could be an innkeeper... I'd run a victorian B&B on the central CA coast. That would be heaven.

If I could be a professor...I'd teach Neuroscience

If I could be a writer... I'd write novels I'd like to read

If I could be a backup dancer... Naah. Too many ex-Fresnans in the biz already....

If I could be a llama-rider... I'd break these guys' backs

If I could be a bonnie pirate... Arrgh. I'd sail the high seas with Ith and Nin and the Pirate before retiring to work in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride as an extra (Yo Ho, Yo Ho, A pirate's life for me.....)

If I could be a midget stripper... Wait, isn't that what moms do when their kids get messy??

If I could be a proctologist... I'd certainly try to remember the difference between brown-nosing and being a sh*t head: Depth Perception

If I could be a TV-Chat Show host... I'd beat Oprah's ratings, and still not be a smarmy arrogant condescencing b*tch as often as she is....

If I could be an actor... I'd make good movies. Not intelligent movies, or artsy movies. Movies people can actually watch!

If I could be a judge... I'd make a law requiring people to take responsibility for their own stupidity.

If I could be a Jedi... My lightsaber would be green, and I would have a purple Jedi robe. Oh, and I'd have Princess Leia hair, too.

Ok, that's it for me. Now I get to choose. Mwahahahahahaha.

Duck, Duck, Goose!
Eeny Meeny Miny Mo!
Ink, Pink, you (don't) stink!

In case you can't recognize your own links, that's Ben, Blogbaby Paul, and Ith! (all of whom, somehow, seem to have missed out on being tagged as of yet... and who should all have pretty interesting answers....)